Nothing Great

I imagine I should fill in a lot of detail since my last post but right now I'm in no mood. 

Returning home from the U.P.  I was looking forward to lacing up my shoes for a short two and a half mile trail run. I did and was shocked when two hours afterwards I was gimping around with a bad Achilles tendon. I had truly thought I was over that. 

Right now, I sit here drinking a glass of red wine while my son Kevin cuts off all his beautiful curly hair.My vacation to Michigan makes me wonder if a few hours on a couch would not serve some good and I look forward to going to bed so I can just forget and get away from the discomfort I'm having all over my body.

Each day starts a new adventure and I keep trying to tell myself that tomorrow, tomorrow will be different, it will be better. 

I am fighting a low .... I will get over it.

Mike 



 


 

I fall down, but still get up again

I don't think I was pushing my luck, no it was just a stick which managed to entwine in the loop of my shoelace which sent me tumbling. I had run five days in a row with Thursday's afternoon run being my first “Double” in quite some time. The morning run had been short and intense with quarter mile bursts about as fast as I dare undertake on trail until “Freight Train” breathing led me to a walk. (Wonderful). The afternoon run would be a moderate paced five miler with some hills.

As falls go it was nothing spectacular, two small cuts on my right arm with a small accompanying knot; scratches filled with trail dirt on my right leg. The fall rating only a six or seven (due to lack of serious blood) normally would have not resulted in any physical setback, yet the right foot, perhaps embarrassed that it had already caused a fall, choose to divert attention by kicking the recovering left Achilles.

With running partners were asking if I was OK, I stood slowly …... taking inventory thinking until my first step that I was just fine. The first step indicated I wasn't. For a moment I thought I would just run it off like I have done hundreds of times before but within a quarter mile or so knew I was done.

Tomorrow will be Sunday and I will meet my trail running group for whatever I can manage, I am encouraged since today I feel pretty good.

If you ask me how everything else is going, I guess I would answer that I'm confused, my hands are getting worse and my feet are getting better. Whatever my abdominal injury is, it's status quo, guess this summer will see a “Roto Rooter Job” as well as a CAT scan; so much more fun to come.

Heading to the U.P. With Dad and my son Kevin next week …... this should be interesting. While up there I am hopeful I can run the “Run Your Bass Off”. Two years ago after finishing radiation I won the 50-59 year age group as well as the senior division.

Stay Happy, Enjoy Summer

In the Storm

Reading Weather maps will not be added to any skills list I may have. Thinking I had an hour to get in a three and a half or four mile trail run I headed out.

A mile and a half into the run the woods suddenly went “Headlamp Dark”; I realized right then I had miscalculated, knowing what I was about to be in for.

Lighting crackled, providing stroboscopic lighting of trail and trees. Wind gusted throwing limbs everywhere and a entire tree a mere hundred feet away. Trail turned into stream as torrents of rain pounded down.

Soaked, turned around and heading home I enjoyed the most invigorating run I've had in some time.

Final Run (In My Fifties)

The Ragnar Trail Relay held at the Bear Bear Lake Resort in West Virginia was an event I had “steered away from” when I was first asked to join a team. Having run a Ragnar Road event and not really enjoying it I thought this just might be more of the same. I was wrong.

In our case a team of eight people would run three different loops Green, Yellow and Red with a combined distance of around sixteen miles and around five thousand seven hundred fifty feet of ascent / descent. My presence was to fill in for a team member who had to drop out.

Normally, three legs would have been nothing more then a good workout, yet heading into the event my hope was to complete two laps. A four mile run on Wednesday morning left me limping around that evening and all day Thursday when my Achilles heel flared up again.

While weather may not have a huge impact on Road Running it can have huge consequences for trail running. Two days of rain prior and during most of the relay, morphed splendid trails into steams, bogs and slip slides. Heavy fog added to the enjoyment, especially at night as light from your headlamp reflected everywhere except where you wanted it.

I was the last team member to show up and as luck would have it I got there just as our first runner was to head out on the first leg. I know the team would be glad to see me anyway but now even even more so as our team of eight dropped to a team of seven. One of our members had a medical issue which prevented him from coming.

Cold rain, pea soup thick fog, mucked up trails might have put a damper on attitude but not with us. Our team Captain Craig, Camp Captain Dave assisted by all the rest of the team created an Oasis from the storm, complete with Propane heat for warming and drying. Hot food, Coffee and snacks appeared whenever needed from Dave who took care of all of us. Craig skillfully revised, planned and took extra loops to make up for our missing compatriot.

My first lap was our first team lap in darkness, my second, the first in daylight the next morning and my final (if I could) would be the next to last loop sometime Saturday afternoon. After two laps the Achilles was sore but runnable.

The final lap on my plan was yellow, but since conditions were difficult and slowing teams down it would be necessary to “Double Up”, meaning two team members would run the same loop together. Jon would be my partner, we would start and finish together.

Yellow would turn out to be my favorite loop. I led for the first four miles running through waist high ferns waving in untouched forests. This trail was perhaps the most technical, reminding me often of home. It also presented the most variety of the three taking us through heavy rocky areas, steams, slicked up hills and finally about a mile of mucked up roadway to the finish. Jon, somewhat new to trail running led the last two something miles holding a solid pace until ........ footsteps behind us............ the pace picked up .......... footsteps went away ........ final three tenths left ........... pace quickens to a sprint as “insurance” we were not going to get passed...................... This immediately returned a memory of pacing a friend forty miles in his first hundred miler only to have him “Run Away” from me at the finish. To be honest he finally caught on and slowed down.

It took some work but I caught up to Jon and we finished together.

As I neared the finish my teammates and strangers were singing Happy Birthday as the announcer called my name proclaiming I had turned sixty, he also mentioned I was looking ahead to running my tenth JFK fifty miler in November. Yes my Teammates had told a “Little White Lie”; tomorrow is my actual birthday but my spirits were lifted even higher by their actions.

It's cool, raining and foggy here on the Mountain today, perfect Ragnar conditions I suppose. My Achilles feels a little sore but I was considering getting one more run as a fifty year old. Writing this I realize the Yellow Loop will remain my last run, what I might do today by myself would be nice but not nearly as meaningful.

I'll save it for tomorrow.............. Thanks Team

TEAM SLUGS 2013

Anna Hartman (Jr Slug)

Blake Capella (Jr Slug)

Christine Dzara

Debi Capella

Jen Hartman

Katy Warehime

Craig Capella (Team Captain)

Dave Hartman  (Camp Captain)

Jonathan Rock

Mike O'Grady

Photo by Dave Hartman

Title Lost

As with many of our golf matches it boiled down to the final hole. After well positioned shots left wedges into the green, a complete breakdown in my swing left me dropping another ball after I found the pond. To twist the knife just a little more Tim (A.K.A. Family Golf God) birdied the hole. Congrats.

With the exception of nine holes of Golf and a couple hours as a volunteer at a local 5K ,I spent the weekend working. After two very quiet weeks in the office things "exploded" and we became very busy. With a full schedule coming this week I knew I needed to get as much done as possible.

I resisted any temptation to run as best I could and only "tested" the Achilles on a one mile jog. This morning I managed slightly more then two miles; "Good News"; the Achilles is getting better; "Bad News"; my abdominal section is not. May be time for a doctor visit to find out what the heck is going on. I think it may require a CAT scan.... Ugh

Joe is coming to town soon and I am looking forward to spending a few days hanging out, playing some golf and just catching up in general.

Hopefully this body of mine will cooperate better then it has for the last few days, I have been feeling a little out of sorts.

Later  ..... Mike

Memorial Day Weekend 2013

I hate to admit it but sometimes a beer or three will help me to sit down at the computer and update my blog.

It's Friday afternoon, five thirty something to be almost something exact; the long weekend has started. While the weekend will not “Pan Out” as I have hoped I am looking forward to the next few days.... Unfortunately, there will be no running.

Perhaps I should view the no running thing as an opportunity to hone my golf game or photography skills. After all, it's never good (or is it) to be singularly focused. Perhaps I could meditate upon how to become a better father, husband, brother or friend........... Should but ???? . Perhaps I should try to figure out if I can win a nine hole Golf Match against brother Tim to remain the “Family Golf God”if I head up to Berkeley Springs tomorrow. Shallow, I know.

As far as “Family Golf God” is concerned, there is a new breeze “A Blowing”, the ZAC ATTACK will soon be on the doorstep wanting his turn at the title. It's only a matter of time, yet I hope to extend that time out as long as possible. (I'm sure his Dad does as well) When it happens, Tim and I will be “Magnanimous in Defeat” quite opposite from our “Not Humble in Victory”.

I have not been able to run in over a week because of my Achilles Tendon. I did mange a great hike however in Virginia of about nine miles with only moderate discomfort. This hike was along a series of Waterfalls which were spectacular. It reminded me of driving along the California Coast Line thinking “The Views Can't Get Any Better”, surprise, each new bend in the road revealed yet another.

The hiking group consisted of two guys in their sixties, myself (just shy of that) and the “Young Buck” a mere fifty four year old. Less then two miles into the hike the youngster of the group exclaimed, “Please Just Give me a Gun if I ever Start Talking about my Issues.” It was right then I realized, Damn it ..... I'm getting closer to a point in life where some uninformed person, upon a moment of bad reflection might think, “He's Old”................ OLD !!! ......... Come on Dude or Dudette Lets go on a ten mile trail run. (Of Course As Soon As I get over these injuries)

On another note, Maggie's last day of High School was today. I am excited for her and sad for myself that my “Little Girl” is growing up. It seems as though just yesterday I sent her off on the school bus for her first day of school. I am so proud of her and grateful that I have survived the cancer to see her through this portion of her life.

I don't know what the months or years ahead will bring but early on through all of this..... I set a goal to see her graduate high school ...... Goal Met !

I'm a happy boy .............. Mike

A Short Run

Fog fills the air, accumulating on leaves to create the occasional falling drop of water. Tree blossoms are starting to add color to the forest and temperatures in the mid fifties make it an absolute perfect day for a trail run.

I started out early with Larry and lasted for a half mile.

Greek Mythology has it that Achilles was an invulnerable warier with the exception of his heel. His last battle ended, when a arrow, tainted with poison found it's mark. While I don't consider myself invulnerable, far from it, I did not expect to be fighting my Achilles Tendon in addition to other injuries. In a word …... Frustrating.

Our Sunday morning running group continues to grow with a new face or two most every weekend. As the group ran off into the mist this morning I must admit my spirits slumped even as I rationalized this as another temporary setback.

As I write, four of my running friends are close to thirty hours into a hundred mile trail race (MMT), all well ahead of the cutoff times (One has finished). Others are out on the “Blue Trail” in the cool mist enjoying what I cannot. I hope to be joining them in the not too distant future.

Mike

Eighteen

It's a warm May morning with overcast skies and breezes suggesting showers are coming.

My regular morning run or walk didn't happen as I woke up gimping around with a sore left foot Achilles Tendon; how this happened I have no idea. It is possible that running barefoot in the grass during a kids track practice last night might have been the trigger. We run barefoot in the grass to teach proper running form.

My return to running has been a mixed bag so far. During the past seven days I have logged about twenty five easy trail miles generally feeling well while running. It's several hours after a run which has been worrisome.

Though the doctors can't tell me what the “Original” injury to my abdominal area is I am pretty sure the subsequent injuries are abductor related. This was probably caused by compensating for the pain in my abdominal section while running. ( a Mike theory) After a lot of research I found a number of exercises and stretches that have helped with the abductors but nothing (yet) that is really helping with the abdominal area. I am sorry to admit that this may be a long recovery, there may be very little racing going on in the near term.

On brighter notes, Patrick returned from France after having a wonderful week. Listening to his stories I could almost imagine being there with him, seeing the sights, touching the stones of the Roman Aqueducts and running across traffic to the dismay of some French Police Officers. You can only imagine how quickly that week in France must have flown by.

Maggie is winding down her High School career and will be leaving TJ on a high note. She has been selected to sing at the Senior Awards Banquet, this is somewhat unusual as typically that honor is reserved for individuals in advanced vocal studies. This past Sunday, Ms Kathy (Voice Instructor) held Senior Recitals and Maggie was astounding. No one knew it at the time but she was feeling horrible as she performed. We drove home with Maggie laying her head in Sue's lap not wanting to open her eyes because of the headache she was having.

Maggie also reached “Adulthood” today as she turns eighteen. Old enough to vote, sign a contract or even get married. As I looked at “Our Baby” leaving the house this morning I felt both joy and sadness. Joy that I am here, to bear witness to my children becoming adults. Sadness from wanting to hold on, something I shouldn't do but allow anyway.

Happy Birthday Maggie, I Love You

Garden Club

Over the weekend a family member pointed out that I hadn't posted anything on my Blog for a couple of weeks...... it's been a mixed bag.

Yesterday (Monday May 6^th) the Berkeley Springs Garden Club planted a Pin Oak in honor of my Mother. It was quite a moving ceremony; stories abounded about good times, wonderful recipes and white wine. It became apparent that good times and service to the community often went hand in hand. I am glad my mother enjoyed the company of these fine women. At the end of the ceremony the youngest of Mom's Grand Children, Alana, would be the first to water the tree.

Many years from now I hope the day will come when Alana shall bring her grandchildren to this spot. If she does she will find a tree, standing tall, home for generations of birds, witness to couples strolling arm in arm and multitudes of young children splashing in the summer pool. Breezes will sway her leaves and she will sing, it will be a song as beautiful as my mother's life.

As for me .... well I'm a work in process .... but I have started running again.

Mike

Walk This Way (Young Frankenstein)

Another week of not running; this is getting old fast. I have been going out for walks .....  this morning I jogged perhaps a quarter mile to gauge my condition. Not there yet but a small improvement I think.

 

Tonight I will see Maggie on TJ (Thomas Johnson High School) stage for the last time, she will be performing tomorrow evening as well but I have a wedding to attend. They are performing “Young Frankenstein”, Maggie plays Frau Blucher (Played by Cloris Leachman in the movie). Needless to say it is quite a departure from her role as Ariel in “The Little Mermaid”

Two years ago I was questioning if I would even see her graduate high school much less perform on stage, I am very grateful and proud. She is in a word... amazing. The director came up to Susan and I last night after the show (we were waiting for Maggie to change) and said, “I will miss that girl, she is talented, she can do it all”. To which I replied, “ She loves it here, flunk her!”. He got a funny look on his face as though he really considered it for a moment. 

Our weekend will be quite busy, Patrick will be coming home, Maggie will have her performances, I'll be helping at a 100 mile race tomorrow morning and then heading to Baltimore for the wedding of a friend's son.  Sunday will be "Run For 

The Rock", a 5K run that I had wanted to "Tear Up", instead I'll participate in the mile walk. 

It will be a good weekend.

Mike

Nine Days

It's been nine days since my last run, I am much more of a mess then I thought I'd be.

There is no doubt that I'm addicted to running but I certainly did not fully understand the implications until I stopped “Cold Turkey”.

First the Physical aspects, within three or four days I started getting leg cramps. This was even after walking or ridding my bicycle, this past Saturday I rode eight miles, Sunday, it was eighteen. (No it wasn't the biking that caused the leg cramps.) The “Impact” associated with running must serve as a nerve stimulator as my feet are experiencing a widening of numbness. Walking does not seem to be an adequate substitute, yesterday my entire right foot went numb across the bottom of my foot. I'd have to check the blog but I think it's been months since I felt numbness across the entire foot.

In addition to the hands and feet issues my GI tract seems to have settled into a different pattern, one that I am not to happy with. I can coax activity through certain foods, beer or several glasses of wine but none of those are healthy long term alternatives. (Augh ..... the foods are healthy enough).

Physicality takes second seat to dealing with my head; there I am a true mess.

If I didn't realize it before, it's now hammered home that running is my link to normalcy. (At least as normal as I'll ever be) Running, even slowly on my beloved trails sends me to a different place. When I am really into it I become ageless, clueless to what has happened and what may lie ahead. I become totally immersed in the moment. There are times that my almost sixty year old body forgets years and responds with the same feelings I had as a younger man even if the effort is not the same; and you ask me why I run ?

My brothers understand this as well. Perhaps not in running, but in biking and weight lifting. Perhaps one of the best complements I ever heard was someone saying, “What is Wrong With You Guys?”..... Nothing ........ Absolutely Nothing .... and ....... ain’t it great.

Mike

Maters Sunday

It's “Masters Sunday”, the official start of my golf season.

This is also the first Sunday of my self imposed cessation of running, it won't be easy but at least biking does not seem to bother me and I managed eighteen hilly miles on my Trek 7500 hybrid this morning. Had I been running I would have been comfortable but today, forty degree temperatures left me half frozen. I suspect, I need more experience to dress properly for biking.

Wednesday evening (last week) after the kids track program I came to the conclusion that I should give myself a chance to heal. It was a record setting hot day with temps hovering around ninety late in the afternoon. Since it was hot the evening program focused on technique rather then speed …... I ran dead last in most of the drills and probably should not have run at all.

Spring is finally here so my resolve to stop running for a while will be tested, it's not like I will be inactive, stretching, biking and hiking will fill in yet they are not good substitutes for that which makes me really happy. Perhaps if I can be a “Good Boy” for another week to ten days I might be able to run the Capon Valley 50K on May eleventh as reward?

Finally, I was stressed this week to learn of another runner friend diagnosed with cancer. He had qualified to run the Boston Marathon and should be in Boston today. I have few details but know that missing the race is the last thing on his mind right now, I pray they have caught it early.

Mike

Spring, Finally Here

This morning the thermometer appeared spring like, showing fifty five degrees, a full twenty degrees warmer then yesterday morning when Larry and I started out on a sixteen mile run.

Most of the run went fine until my foot got tangled in some dead branches causing me to lurch forward pulling on my abdomen. Ouch …... I felt it but for the remainder of the run it was simply uncomfortable. It was a different story a few hours later as everything tightened up. Worse then my gut, what I'm assuming are my hip flexors went ballistic. For the first time in a long time I took a pain pill during the day.

In addition to a “kind” Monday morning thermometer, my body decided to be “kind” as well. The stretching and strengthening must be paying off. Even so, I discounted any idea of a run, opting instead to head out with Molly for a three mile walk.

I was surprised at the silence, approaching a fire pond the only sound was that of a single Mallard calling out. Tomorrow I suspect, there will be a roar from hundreds of frogs “looking for love”. Hopefully I'll experience this tomorrow morning during a short run.

My three month checkup last week with Dr. Goldstein (Oncologist) went well. For now I am not seeking any therapy or prescriptions to deal with the Neuropathy but I will start taking Alpha Lipoic Acid.

As far as my GI tract is concerned, well that is going to be a work in progress for some time to come. I have cut down on the amount of fiber I'm eating a day but that really has not made much of a difference. I imagine time will be my best medicine.

Spring is finally here ….. hurray !

Mike

Good Friday 2013

The last couple of days have been a tale of two different individuals wrapped in one body.

Tuesday morning I saw Dr. Berg, I arrived wearing my Terrapin Mountain shirt, feeling pretty well. There was just a lingering hint of the effort I put forth on Saturday (excepting my abdominals and hip flexors). We discussed my situation and the plan going forward involves stretching and strengthening. If, by the end of April I don't see any improvement I'll seek out a sports doctor or physical therapy.

Wednesday morning I awoke felling all my toes on both feet. I have been close to this before but this was the best it's been in a year ..... progress ! Of course almost immediately upon standing up both feet commence their move to partial numbness.

Thursday morning I decided it was time for a run and I headed out for a slow five, I made two and a half before my feet started to hurt. This is a new development that I am not too pleased about. Numb is better than pain but I guess this may be the start of healing and I'll just deal with it.

Thursday was also the day that Dr Toe Thane and I would be thanked for our donations of photographs at the FMH Regional Cancer Center. There was a nice gathering, a presentation of plaques followed by a tour to observe our framed work. It was quite enjoyable, yet as we walked the halls my feet started feeling like a hive of tiny bees had invaded and were voicing their displeasure.

My hands, which have been sore for months reached a new height of nasty when earlier today I went to wash them. The water was cold and felt like acid as soon as it ran over my hands. This is a new and totally unexpected development.

It's been fifteen months since chemotherapy ended, I have felt I was moving forwards (even if at a horrific slow pace) yet these new developments have me concerned.

Today is Good Friday, it's been a slow business day so I have been able to reflect upon the last few months. It's been difficult but not without it's rewards. I now look ahead to when the skies are clear, weather is warm and awaking with no thought of anything physical. I look ahead to running on light feet, kissing my wife, loving my kids and feeling a hundred percent at peace .... it will come.

Happy Easter All ..... Mike

Terrapin Mountain 2013

Driving down to Sadelia Virginia I expressed doubt that I would be able to repeat the performance I pulled off  at Terrapin Mountain a year ago. There were many reasons to think that I could yet I felt I had run such an inspired race in 2012 it would be difficult to repeat.

The plan was simple, attack the uphills and hope I didn't loose too much time on the down hill sections. The second part of the plan was equally as simple..... hope.

Saturday morning as I got ready for the race I really did not want to wear abdominal support but I knew if I didn't there would almost be no chance I would be able to run hard for thirteen miles. The injury I sustained in November, two weeks prior to JFK was re-injured and now plagues me on any runs over ten miles.

The start of the race saw overcast skies with temperatures hovering around thirty degrees. Perfect !

I placed myself in the middle of the pack, starting out nice and easy. Even so, I felt pain and discomfort across my midsection almost immediately. "Great", I thought. "This is not going to be a whole lot of fun".

Almost as quickly as it started it went away and by the time we reached the trail I felt good with spirits rising.

Last year I ran less than three months after surgery and just a few days after finding out that my Mother had Cancer. With her on my mind I ran what I consider one of the best runs I've ever had finishing in fourteenth place.

This year, three months after my Mothers Death and a scant few days after the passing of my running friend Rick O'Donnell I took on Terrapin dedicating my race to the two of them.

Splashing through the first steam crossing I felt I had an advantage over many of my fellow runners as I heard "God that water was cold, my feet are going numb." Though my feet are not totally numb they are about fifty percent ........so .............. no distress for me, I'm already use to it.

Without a Garmin, no watch, nothing to indicate time or distance I just felt like I was running well. I ran most of the way up to the first aid station (4.1 miles) Passing quite a few people with my legs feeling stronger as I went along.

Leaving the aid station, the summit push is really steep, more of a power walk then a run and my legs delivered. The training hikes up "TV Trail" loaded with a thirty pound pack had paid off. Arriving at the summit I punched my bib and off I went. Now for the part of the run I dread, three miles of downhill. Some of the sections are pleasant enough, but there seem to be more which are just "evil". My knees do not approve.

I had no way of knowing it but when I reached the summit I must have been the sixth runner. While I tried to push my downhill speed I still stepped aside multiple times to let runners pass, I did not feel slow but in a minute they would disappear from site. Perhaps they were simply figments of the imagination?

At the last aid station I felt good and replied to the question "What do you want ?" , with a snappy  "Young Legs". I got a laugh but the old legs were just fine and with uphill pulls ahead I was optimistic about catching some of the runners who smoked me on the downhill.

I caught and passed two, all the while feeling strong, being pushed by something I haven't felt for some time, the pure joy of running.

The final mile of this race places you back on a road and this is when pain returned to my midsection and Hip Flexors. With no one visible ahead or behind I set a comfortable pace to finish the race.

Approaching the finish I could see the clock displaying  2 Hours 23 Minutes. I had bettered last years time by almost five minutes. Prior to the start of the race I hoped for a top twenty finish, I ended by finishing eighth overall and first in my age group "Grand Master". (Next year Super Grand Master) Others have said they were not surprised but I for one am.

My run complete, in great spirit, nothing would ruin my day including five trips to the bathroom after my GI track went into protest.  The "Good News" .......... no need to stop anywhere on the four hour ride home !

As I write this a spring snow piles up outside. Hopefully this will be the last snow of the year. Black and white will yield to color and we'll move ahead into the time of new life. I am optimistic.

Mike



















 

Rick Is Gone

A friend passed away early Saint Patrick's Day morning after his long fight with cancer.

I do not have the words to express the depth of my sorrow for his wife, daughters and family. I've written about Rick O'Donnell before and though we knew this day would come it still is difficult. There will be a service this Saturday, I won't be there as I will stick with my plan to run Terrapin Mountain. I know that Rick would have wanted it that way. I will run now with my Mother and Rick as inspiration to give the best I can.

I have written before that my hands and feet are “New Barometers” of heath. I learned of Rick's passing early Sunday morning, just prior to heading out for my group run. It was chilly outside, just a bit below freezing but I was comfortable while running. We ran eight and a half miles at a decent pace, I felt strong when we finished, yet minutes later, for the first time in months fingers on my right hand went partially numb. Later, at home, nice and warm the numbness in my feet increased and my hands hurt. A couple of aspirin helped and later in the day I felt good enough to drive Patrick back to school. (End of Spring Break)

My buddy Larry has his birthday today, tomorrow it's Mel and Mom. (Mom would have been 82)

Happy birthday all !

Mike 

PS> Just got my Terrapin Seeding and the "Pressure is Off". Last year the race director (by mistaken identity I think) , Clark Zealand seeded me fourteenth which is exactly where I finished..... this year ........ 55th. Pretty sure if I have a decent race I'll more then live up to those expectations !  Bring it on !

Rick's Picnic

This was certainly a weekend to reflect upon.

Physically it was not my best: with a snowstorm coming in on Wednesday I did an aggressive hill run on Tuesday, just beating the living daylights out of myself. Wednesday was a “Cross Training” snow shovel day, ....... working hard enough to the point I'm breathing like anyone finishing a hundred meter dash. Thursday and Friday were short hiking days with a thirty pound pack. I assumed that the weekend would see a couple of really good runs.

Saturday yielded perfect weather and with the return of my friend Larry I ran seven miles “In Town”, my first “Off Trail” run since November. We enjoyed the run but my midsection complained moderately from the first to last step. It was not a result of our run, more likely it came from cutting firewood, snow shoveling or one of my hikes.

With the time change (Spring Forward) I looked out our bedroom window Sunday morning to see less sunshine then I would have expected at seven o'clock. Yikes, one hour ............. I need to meet the trail group at eight.

There have been many times in the past, when sleep, finally shook off led to the realization that I had minutes to dress prior to meeting running friends at Hamburg Road. I have been known to show up with different running shoes after utilizing a “Grab and Tie” shoe frenzy..........  Those days are gone ............... not complaining but now I like to have two hours to get ready.

An hour, not enough time .........these days ......... I showed up at Hamburg with my guts spinning but ever hopeful that the act of running would calm everything down. It didn't happen ...... I turned around with the six mile group instead of finishing the full eleven or twelve that I had hoped to run.

Returning home I felt bad but not as bad as I would feel an hour later..... and ..... I started feeling sorry for myself .......... this sucks!

At one o'clock members of the Frederick Steeplechasers would be heading to a small park directly across from Rick O’Donnell's home. Rick is a second “go around” cancer patient, a man who survived years longer than any doctor expected and if you have read my posts has served as an inspiration to me.

No longer able to walk, we wheeled Rick to the Pavilion where all our friends waited. The pain medication Rick is on makes him “Zone Out” yet often .... when you get his attention ...... there is a wry smile that lets you know he is there. I saw that smile quite a few times.

Feeling sorry for myself .............. I ought to be ashamed, but I won't beat myself up ........ for if I have learned anything ............ it's that being human is to lead an imperfect existence .......... problems of others may seem to dwarf ours yet our own issues push and compel us to relate the best we can.

Individuals like Rick and my Mother are those to be looked at as a guideline as to how handle adversity when life throws it your way.I hope I have learned something.

Two more weekends until Terrapin, this should be a hard training week.. I am looking forward to it. 

Mike 

Relay Day

I arrived at Mount Saint Mary's University a tad later then I figured, I wanted to visit my Mother's Grave-site. There was a half hour before the American Cancer Society Relay for Life was to start but the sun was setting, I knew it was not kosher to be walking around the Grotto or the Graveyard after sunset. ( Perhaps a posted sign gave me a clue)

The distance from the Gym to the grave has to be less than a mile with a good hill waiting at the end. According to my cell phone it was exactly 6:30; the relay started at seven, plenty of time to power walk up and jog back down.

This would be my first visit since the burial, I knew where needed to go but in the dwindling light it took several minutes once I got in the general area to find her.

With night coming I could barley read the name on the metal marker, one which will be replaced sometime by a headstone. The clear night revealed dancing lights in the valley below, it was beautiful. I had no idea how I would feel but soon, I realized I was totally comfortable. Mom would have wanted it that way. I spent a few minutes, talked a bit and then headed to the Relay.

Spring is Coming ........... New Life ............... Later ........ Mike

Writers Block

I feel like it's been a while since my last post and even so I don't really want to write anything, in the past week I have started and stopped several times, lack of motivation, lack of time, lack of words (aka writers block).

No idea why I remain in a funk but I'm fighting the best I can.

There are things that I do know and I can write.......

I Miss My Mom
I'm Proud of Dad
I Love My Wife
My Children
My Family
My Friends
And Life

It's about all I can say right now.

Mike

Mornings

It's interesting that we take for granted the most simple of things until they no longer are so simple.

Take waking up, in the past I'd awake, look at the clock and be relieved if I had more time to sleep or curse that I needed to jump out of bed. (Just a note I hardly ever use an alarm clock anymore)

Today I awoke.......  looked at the clock and realized I had twenty minutes before I "needed" to get up to escort Maggie to the school bus. The check list immediately starts....

How are the feet ........ move them around a bit ....... most mornings now I feel most of my toes. (Cool)

How is the GI tract  ...... this is the harder issue to hone in on.... surprises are still plentiful. Flipping on my back sometimes provides some clues. This morning I'm pretty sure I can wait until the bus leaves ........ then  .........  I will take my place on the throne.

Bus gone, a bowl of Irish Oats consumed "The Force" calls. Then it's taking Susie to work, (we are once again a one car family.)  Returning home, Twenty Two degrees and windy, I really don't want to go outside for a run but I do anyway and feel better for doing so.

Each morning it's very much the same and it seems almost pitiful that at this stage I am not further along then I am. I know I have little cause to complain, I'm not pushing Daisies but never the less I want better.

In a conversation yesterday I mentioned that the only times I'm not uncomfortable are

If I'm Running
If I've had a few drinks
If I'm on Pain Pills

I don't particularly like option number two or three but I just can't run all the time no matter how much better it makes me feel. (Well to be honest option two ain't too bad occasionally)

I know I should be grateful but tonight I am pissed off, hopefully I can dig out of this and be motivated tomorrow !

Bill and Tim ...... Climb Safe over the next few days ..... wish I could be there with you manly men ... don't loose your tent !

Bro Mike