2013 Ends

This morning I hiked in a cold pouring rain with my head "bouncing" from thought to thought.

The weather, though particularly nasty was my option to experience. I could have just as easily stayed indoors in the comfort of my house or office. Yet hiking allowed me to think about the coming Year (I do my best thinking on the trails), and what it might bring, hopefully brighter days then the year who is closing it's doors.

This entire past week has been a time of reflection, there has been virtually no business activities over the holiday. There has also been reminders that I am not the same as I was just a few years ago. Monday evening I was a "stones throw" from having Sue take me to the hospital, pain in my gut grew intense enough to double me over and send me to bed by seven P.M.. While I probably will never know the cause I suspect just getting out of my normal routine and not drinking enough water left me dehydrated.

On the flip side, last night I spent the entire evening virtually 100% pain free with no assistance from pain killers or drink. This after a day of dual trail runs and several hours of cutting, hauling, splitting and stacking firewood. Odd isn't it that a high degree of physical activity should leave me pain free, the first time naturally in two and a half years. It was wonderful.

I am also waking up often with almost one hundred percent feeling in my feet, of course a minute or two of walking and "Mr. Left and Right" dulls up but I'm feeling this is heading in the right direction.

With the feet getting better of course the hands have to bring balance by being as big a pain in the ass as ever. The cold weather aggravates whatever is going on and I need to be careful when the temperature falls under fifty degrees.

As this year comes to it's conclusion I will focus on those things I can control and try to forget about those which I cannot. There is much on my plate, no doubt I will feel pressure, yet I have gained a perspective over these past couple years which should help me to be a better husband, father, brother, son and friend ..... and after all, isn't that all that really counts?

Happy New Year All.

Mike

Twins

Monday I drove down to Baltimore to pay last respects to a “Business Friend”, an individual that I have worked with for twenty plus years, just a great guy.

Personally, I know of no one who would include viewings and funerals in their “These Are a Few of My Favorite Things” song. (Although there are some twisted souls who might). In addition I have never seen a corpse who looks good, they look dead; not a good look even if you’re a vampire.

Seeing my friend laid out, he did not seem to bear any resemblance to the man I had known, I even considered that perhaps I was in the wrong room….. Until ….. There he was ……. Standing right in front of me ……… A Vision, Hallucination, Out of Body Experience ……. No none of the above …….. For my friend in twenty some odd years ………… never mentioned …………. His identical twin brother.

Goodbye Fred, I’ll miss you.

Mike

Surprise

Monday afternoon a box truck arrived with a early Christmas gift from a great friend and his family.

If you have not read my blog then you'll never understand the significance of "The Putt", an entry I made after participating in a charity golf event. Well to be perfectly honest I had forgotten it as well but the "Special Santa's" had not and their "Santa" Box Truck delivered what the "Golf God's" had "Robbed" me of.

The element of surprise, it is so variable.  Sometimes arriving as a nescience, a wakeup, a PITA, new joy or the devil you did not want to dance with. In any case, surprise takes many forms. In the past few days surprise has spanned a gamut for me, yet Monday afternoon, after good news, snow and ice shoveling the day ended with a total surprise I had not counted on.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa. (New York Sun 1897)

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.
Thanks and Happy Holidays all ... Mike

PS> At Sixty Years Old I still feel like a kid

All Clear

Well excepting for ice, snow and freezing rain received yesterday and early AM today I managed to make my appointment with Dr. Goldstein, my oncologist.

I am happy to report that my CT Scan came back with no indication that anything is wrong with me. Well nothing

So, now very much relieved here is where I am at.

The side effects from the treatments and surgery linger on but seem to be getting better. I have identified many "Triggers" which send my body into complete revolution including ...... drum roll ....... intense physical exercise.

The irony that I can go out and run ten fifteen miles on the trail at a twelve minute pace with no issues. Give me a 5K ..... Running Hard ..... A Price Will Be Paid. This past weekend I ran a ten miler at the Byron Run in a comfortable hour twenty and the spent four hours in the can. Well, I can deal with that.

I received bad news for a couple of friends in the last forty eight hours. I imagine it's just life but I surely do wish that just prior to Christmas, bad news would cease.

I am happy with my news, ready to put 2013 behind me and look ahead to brighter days.

Mike

JACK and CAT

It has been eleven days since JFK. In those eleven days I have seen some really good days and some which I would have preferred to have passed by.

Tomorrow I head down to be scanned; (CAT Scan) to see if there might be any signs of Cancer. Depending upon how you look at it this shall be two years after treatment ceased.

I’m nervous yet hopeful as well, I have recovered well after my 50 miler and am feeling pretty darn good even if my alter ego (Mr. GI) hasn’t been fully cooperative.

My eight mile run this morning took a whole lot of edge off of me and I suspect everything will be just fine ……… yet …… I wonder …….. and yes worry.

I am hopeful ……. the shot of “stuff” they will give me tomorrow before the scan will elicit the same “Jack Daniels Effect”; I had the first time ; a warm glow flowing through the body. (Just like doing a real shot after a long day of hiking)  They told me at the first one it might make me feel like I have to “Pee”.

Bring it on!

Enjoy ….. Mike “O”