How fortunate I am to have a great family and wonderful friends, it keeps me moving on.

It has been a number of months since my last post as I simply did not want to address many of the things that were going with me and people I care about.

The sudden death of my Best Friends wife was without a doubt one of the most horrible experiences of my life. Cancer reached out and took a sweet and wonderful person who, after giving so much was on the brink of enjoying a retired life in the home of her dreams. As a friend I felt powerless to take away the pain my friend and his daughter (my god child) endured and are enduring now. Even today it seems surreal and so unfair.

In addition to watching the struggles of several friends with Cancer another has been diagnosed with ALS. With cancer you may have a fighting chance, with ALS you simply waste away over time.

As for me, well, I guess things may be turning around a bit. After sixteen months of running with foot pain my sweet wife (the google queen) found a video showing three foot exercises I had never seen before. Three weeks after starting them I began to run pain free, you just cannot imagine how I felt that first time I realized there ways no pain during or after a five mile run.

Now the "Battle" is to get back in shape. I have to admit that my lack of running was compensated for by a beer consumption routine that added twenty unsightly pounds to my frame. The good news is that it's down to fifteen pounds, the bad .... at sixty-three those pounds seem more stubborn! I will finish the year out without completing an ultra run. I did manage a couple 25K's and a half marathon but that's it. Hopefully 2017 will see a slimmer me and a couple of Ultras.

I also am to the point where I am guessing the chemo induced neuropathy may not get much better. I believe it is better than what it was a couple years ago but it just won't go away. Concerned about my continued use of Hydrocodone I tried some alternatives, First, Gabapentin... this did not work well in the past but I decided to give it another go at a slightly higher dose. About a week after stating it I broke out in a horrible rash, I quite using it and the rash went away after a week. Not convinced that the "Gabbys" caused the rash I tried again. After just an hour after taking a half dose my wife asked me, "What's wrong with your face". Now some mean spirited people might make a snide comment at this point but the truth was I started breaking out again.

Attempt two was to try Lyrica. Like the "Gabbys" the Lyrica didn't seem to work as well as Hydrocodone but it did work. Two weeks into taking it I started having very disturbing dreams, after a few days of this I dumped the remainder of the prescription down the toilet (We have a septic tank) and the dreams went away. I felt terribly guilty as the Lyrica cost the insurance company an obscene amount of money.

So it appears my choice for now will be to stick with the Opiate. I will try to stay at my 5mg dosage but after five years I have built up a tolerance so that sometimes I need 7.5 mg to get relief. (I can generally tell when the extra will be needed) This has meant this month that I have run out a few days short of the end of the month. I don't seem to suffer withdrawal effects but I cannot sleep, I have had eight hours in the past three days with four of those hours coming last night in two, two hour sessions. I sleep with my feet outside of the covers but even that isn't enough. I can get up and walk on our cool floors which works for a while. I have some lotion I'll rub on my hands and that also gives some temporary relief. I will tell you this is far better then fours years ago when I use to stand barefoot in the snow to quell the fire.

I started this off by talking about my family and friends for they are my strength. As I get older my body may weaken but my appreciation for those I love and care about only intensifies. I am a lucky man.

Mike

Sue, Joe and I in California

Fathers Day weekend and so far it'd not one I will care to remember much in the future.

A blowout argument with my sister Kathy over "stupid stuff" last night, has been overshadowed with news from my college roommate, dear friend and another brother that his wife was taken to the hospital last night. A CAT scan found nodules in multiple sites and her lymph nodes are enlarged . Another CAT scan will be done later today to follow up on the initial tests. Today, we were supposed to be on the Golf Course enjoying each others company.

This news reminded me of the day I was told I had cancer, trust me it is a terrifying experience, and to be honest, I had suspected it for some time.  I am hopeful that tests later today will tell a story different than the one I hope not to hear.

Another dear friend, who after battling stage 4 breast cancer (second time around) found out that the chemo she was getting did not reach her brain because of the brain / blood barrier. End result, after beating all the tumors everywhere else in her body three appeared in her brain. Surgery removed one and the other two will be treated with Cyber knife.

Yesterday I went to a funeral of a younger running friend whose father had died from Bile Duct Cancer at the age of fifty eight.

I realize it's just not me but millions who know the hardships this disease brings.

Few or no one reads this blog anymore and that doesn't matter, it is therapy for me to get this out . Cancer, the fear of cancer and it's consequences suck.

Mike

Spring 2016

April 11, 2016

It has been quite some time since my last post; much has changed yet much has remained the same.

The death of my friend Larry Key moved me to pitch the idea of memorial scholarships to our local running club; The Frederick Steeplechasers, it was accepted early this year and I have been pushing forwards on it. Next weekend I will host a memorial Run / Bike / Hike in the watershed to help raise funds for the scholarships. The response from my fellow runners, Larry’s friends and family has been good; all I need now is great weather.

As far as I am concerned, I keep moving forwards if only at a snail pace. The problems I have been having with my right foot still exist but not to the extent of just a few months ago. In March I ran the Terrapin Mountain half marathon without pain. Thinking I was finally over my injury  I ran a few days later, a mere three miles leaving me limping and gimping the following day.

Patience may be the key; I have cut my mileage and intensity in the hope that I’ll heal. As the weather warms (Had snow yesterday) I intend to start cycling. I have started weight lifting (again) and hopefully this time I’ll stick with it for more than a few weeks.  My focus with weights will be more with whole body exercises such as squats, presses and deadlifts. I will also work on my core with planks.

My hands are still a mess but perhaps a less so then at the end of 2015. I still need the pain medication, especially to sleep but sometimes I find I can go a day or more without. Everything is intertwined so eating well; rest, exercise and trying to limit stress certainly help. I have also found that taking Magnesium has helped my Gastro track and sleep patterns.  There have been some nights when I have slept five or six continuous hours, which for me, is huge.

Spring is coming and I look forward to leaves on trees, flowers and warm afternoons.

Stay happy all …. Mike